I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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