oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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