I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
It's Friday. Sex?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
