Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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