oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
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Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize