I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
