I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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