But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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