There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
There's even glitter on my cock...
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