i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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