every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
