remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
where does the pee come out of this thing
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
