I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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