So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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