i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
