Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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