But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
