Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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