Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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