brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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