My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
