Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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