awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize