We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
