in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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