You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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