my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
