I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Drunk is a universal language darling
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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