know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
