in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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