I'm drive I can fine osifer
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.