I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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