I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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