You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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