i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
