Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
