this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize