im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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