you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
