i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
