It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
