If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
