id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
