Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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