i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
