she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
