remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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