Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
