I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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