If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Can vaginas get frostbite?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
