u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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