Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
